IKEA’s Assembly Directions for Your Life

by Oliver Cassidy

Open box carefully — contents may have shifted during transit. Lay out all parts on the floor, even the weird ones you don’t understand yet. Use included tools only; others may damage your self-esteem. If something feels like it doesn’t fit, turn it around — it might belong somewhere else entirely. Call a friend when you get frustrated, but don’t let them build it for you. And remember: it won’t look like the picture right away, but give it time — it’s yours.

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Oliver Cassidy leads with his heart and walks and walks and walks.