She Decides

by Michael Ward

Scholars of life have posited that extreme love and extreme hatred diverge so completely on the scale of human emotion as to be almost indistinguishable. I have loved so absolute and immeasurable that the line separating the two emotions is blurred. Circumstances dictate what I would call this singular emotion at any given time... love and hate competes for publicity but remain the same feeling. This thought is disturbing... that the chasm that divides love and hate is not as wide as we profess it to be... that we can be so enamored with someone that we easily sway from love to hate to love to hate... all in the same breath... the same moment in time. Both love and hate demand that they are given freely and totally and without reservation... it is when we give only so much of either that we fail. To that end, I did not fail... I love... and hate her... it is consequently her that decides which.


Michael Ward is a Chicago based writer by night and a corporate hack by day. His journals are secret like a 10 year old but he writes about baseball for a few diehard fans at Orioles Insider.


Leatherdykeuk said...

A delightful piece of dichotomy

Kristen said...

I like the weakness of the character, and how his vacillating from love to hate (almost as if to explain one of them away, or if not that, as if to justify to himself his inability to do one or the other for any length of time) is as flimsy, strength-wise, as his ability to take responsibility for what he feels (instead dropping the responsibility on the woman).

[as I see it, anyway. I could be way off. Wouldn't be the first time.]

austere said...

other than the last line, which brings in a "its all your fault!" flimsiness to the character, the rest was something I completely agree with, its a continuum with woozy boundaries.