20071128

Queue

by Loobell

She shuffled awkwardly forwards in the queue, kicking the bag along the pathway in front of her with her battered sneakers and ran her bitten fingers through her matted hair, sighing audibly as she did so. The others waiting in line wrinkled their noses in disgust at the somewhat ripe smell surrounding her slight body, moving out of the way slightly, yet keeping their spot whilst trying to pretend they hadn’t noticed her. She thrust a hand deep into her jacket pocket in a somewhat theatrical manner and rifled around for a moment or two expelling several used tissues and some empty sweet papers, until she found what she was looking for. Her queue mates made noises of disapproval as the debris were caught by the wind and blown along down the street like pieces of confetti, but no one actually said anything to her. Hesitantly yet deliberately she dialed the number into the mobile phone she had retrieved and pressed send, screwing up her bright blue eyes against the early morning sun and exhaling a cloud of frosty breath. "Mum it’s me, don’t speak, no credit... I’m coming home," she said, then promptly burst into tears.

6S

Loobell - harassed middle aged mother, badly lapsed blogger - is fed up with taking the blame. She once showed us the Light at the End of the Tunnel.

8 comments:

austere said...

the end is like a thread.Liked much.

Quin said...

it stays strong... well done.

Madam Z said...

Oh, how sad and sweet, Loobell. I can just see that poor little lost soul, and hope that she finds herself again.

Paul said...

well written and all, but sounds like a start to a sex story book, (not a bad thing) lol.. the next bit should be interesting :D i mean wots the reason she going home!? ???

x

Estelle said...

As i read this Loo, its like you are in touch with me on the Tina escapades that have been ongoing in my home, she virtually done the same thing rang home said she would be here and no credit in her phone either, i can relate so much to this piece...so well written once again. wish everyone would take time and read it carefully like Paul, how does it relate to a sex story unless thats all thats in your head, which isnt up to much if thats all you can take from this piece xxx P.S obviously she loves her mum! thats why!

Loobell said...

loobellThank you Austere, Quin, MadamZ.

Paul.. I really can't see the sex novel connection here ... But I am glad you got something from it.

Estelle: This was kind of inspired by your situation, it is fiction- but I would like to dedicate it to you.

Big Ev said...

You are going from strength to strength Loobell. "Queue" has left me ,and others, looking forward to your next piece. Please dont leave is in suspense too long.

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