UZS

by Rod Drake

I had to admit that, by and large, the zombies were good workers, reliable and uncomplaining, but a tad slow, being mindless, shambling and all, plus their personal hygiene and appearance left much to be desired, but after all, no American worker this day and age is perfect. When Hurricane Katrina destroyed their natural environment, the sugar cane fields, and scattered the voodoo priestesses, the zombies moved north, looking for, well not really a job, but a purpose. That’s where the company I work for came in; they added a mail, message and package delivery branch called the United Zombie Service, or UZS, for short. Since the zombies shuffled around all day anyway, were easy to direct, required no salary or benefits (being dead and all), it seemed a natural fit, as long as UZS stayed away from delivering medical organs for transplant and dissection (particularly B-R-A-I-N-S). The company appointed me the operations manager of UZS, given my many years of excellent service and my affinity, they believed, for the unique “lifestyle” of the zombies. It’s true that I have my own problems, but they are completely under control and don’t affect my day shift work at all (twice a month, when the moon is full, I do get pretty wild and hairy, and must run free and howl a bit).

6S

Rod Drake, author of Crime Birds, is the Official 6S Author of Halloween and Friday the 13th. Check out his longer stories in Flashes of Speculation, Fictional Musings, Flash Flooding, Flash Forward and MicroHorror.