I’ve Seen It All!

by Joe Julian

Lissen up, now! I've been to THREE county fairs, fought in a war, been immunized, been to a brandin', seen a human baby born, seen a naked woman besides my wife, been married only once, saw John F. Kennedy in person, been on trial once, drove over a hunnert miles an hour, stood atop a mountain, been in a car wreck, smoked cigarettes, had my appendix out and rode a boxcar all the way to Olympia, WA. I've attended an opera, rode a horse, drank whiskey straight from the bottle, swum nekkid in the river, been in a submarine, held a hummingbird in my hand, drove a truck, clumb a radio tower, flown a helicopter, had a boy and a girl child and sung on stage. But friends and neighbors, I ain't NEVER seen before what I'm about to tell you now. You know how youngsters today spray paint their initials on poles and buildings and bridges, called "Tagging”? Last Sattidy, (an' I swear it's true), I saw a "tagged" cow: spray painted initials right on her flank -- I can die knowing that now I've seen it all.


Joe Julian is a telecommunications equipment installer, an old geezer and a wanna-be writer.


Quin said...

that was a hoot.

golfwidow said...

Too funny. Loved it.

Madam Z said...

That's the new way of branding, Joe. PETA won't let use branding irons any more.

Great story, by the way. Sounds like you've lived a rich, full life.

Karen said...

Hi, Karen from Countyfairgrounds.net - here - sorry - I found the fact that our young people spray painting on cows a very sad thing. People work hard to exhibit their cows - it takes a lot of patient and grooming and work. Kids need something better to do.

silverlasha said...

Seems that you have done it all. What do you have left to fill the rest of your life? How about, spread happiness-Smile-And stop and smell the Roses!!

Love and Light

sporadic reader said...

Karen: that, and it's really just not a nice thing to do to a cow.

On the story: enjoyed the energy.