20070730

I Loved Him Enough to Allow It

by Stephanie Bee

I loved him in a magnificent way. None of it made sense, it was both messy and gorgeous. The way he made me breathe, the way I was afraid and alive with him, the way I could cry gloriously in his arms, sob as I confessed my deepest fears, laugh as he spun me around the dance floor in front of all of his friends. And then, because I allowed it, he hurt me. He hurt me because I gave myself permission to be vulnerable, because I let him touch my secrets, because I trusted him to make them better. But most importantly of all, he hurt me because I only spoke to him when I knew he was listening, and when he was listening, I spoke the truth.

6S

Stephanie Bee, author of I Shall Be Punished, was trained as an investigative reporter, and has lived all over the world, including London and Australia. She currently resides in New York City with two fabulous roommates who politely deal with her assortment of male suitors. You can read more about the sagas of Stephanie's love life (and other adventures) at Spread Eagle in NYC.

5 comments:

golfwidow said...

Truth can be that way.

Quin said...

why do we do that? that gutting thing? thanks for the words, bee.

he said...

I didn't know those were your "secrets" I was touching.

Madam Z said...

If I've learned nothing else about love, I have learned to keep my secrets secret.

It's a touching story, Ms. Bee.

G said...

I love someone in exactly the same way (makes me feel alive just by knowing his darkness). Nice sixer.