Teatime Tangent

by Louise Yeiser

In my next life I’m going to have those legs (I looked the other way to avoid staring, but gave up after about two seconds). And those arms and that hair (I took a sip of tea) and those eyes and those hands with their ten perfect fingernails shaped in squares and painted just the right amount of white. The tea was too hot. I was supposed to be enjoying my little Starbucks escapade, sipping sweet tea that tasted like gingerbread graham crackers, munching an exquisite — albeit unusually crumbly — piece of coffee cake, and dissecting fragments of poems assigned for homework due tomorrow; but instead, I was placing my order for my next life and burning the roof of my mouth. It was a relief when she finally left, giving me a nice, round derriere that was quickly added to my list. And that was the end.

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Louise Yeiser, author of A Tribute to Madam Z, is a published writer and writing student at the University of Pittsburgh. She authors Sneak Peeks, edits A Good Look at Mastiffs and lives with her two cats and as many English Mastiffs as she can fit into her house. This week, her hobbies include homemade soup, walking in the cold, and Season 2 reruns of Grey’s Anatomy.