20110101

Flight 253

by Jason Henry McCormick

The aisle seat had cost me $1284.91, and a cute Dutch girl in her mid twenties sat between me and an older guy who had a whistling snot and the window seat. The flight had gone smoothly for $1300.91 (I had four jack and cokes) until about fifteen minutes before we landed in Detroit, just after the fasten seat belt sign turned on and its ding dinged again. We had begun our final decent when suddenly some guy set himself on fire two rows in front of me, so I decided to help/spear-tackle the troubled young man that was engulfed in flames, and it ruined my brand new dress shirt. When they finally let us off the plane I had to speak with cops and reporters for an hour and a half about the flight that had cost me $1351.08. When they let me go, I went to the baggage claim, and there I waited two more hours until someone who worked for the airline finally told me that they had lost my luggage. The flight ended up costing me $1881.22 total, and all I could think about was why the hell didn’t I book my flight through Orbitz?

6S

Jason Henry McCormick reads and writes in San Francisco, California. His blog can be found here.