by Daniel Schweimler

Most people said that Mrs Gomez didn’t deserve to die – at least not in the brutal and bloody way in which I bludgeoned her to death. Others felt that I should at least have spared the dog. But a whole wall of the prison cell in which I’m writing this is covered in letters of support. Mr Martinez from Buenos Aires for example wrote that the attitude and behaviour of people like Mrs Gomez – while on the surface insignificant and even banal – were the first cracks in the structure of a civilized society and should be forcefully eradicated, by whichever means necessary. Mrs Gomez was unfortunate, I’ll admit, to be the one I’d managed to get my hands on after the other retrogrades had, under the cover of darkness or while I was otherwise engaged, left their foul smelling calling cards right outside my front door. And even when I caught them in the act, they ignored or abused me, despite the sign on the tree clearly indicating in bold red letters that Dog Owners MUST Clean Up After Their Animals.


Daniel Schweimler is an Englishman living in Buenos Aires where he used to be a journalist (but got tired of making things up so is dedicating himself to creative writing instead).