by Peter Farmer
Instead of tackling your opponent, make a sweeping gesture to your side and say, "Right this way, my good man!" Attempt 90-yard field goals. Bunt a lot. Play naked. Keep throwing passes to the fat chick in Section 24. Right before the game, trade your entire team to Hollywood for the cast of House.
Peter Farmer, who's never coached, likes the Steelers today. How about you? (Click here to make a donation to Peter, half of which will support 6S.)