Irreconcilable Differences

by Linda Courtland

The bald eagle's wife was tired of hearing about Rogaine®. Earlier, she caught him stealing worried glances of white feathers in the rear-view mirror of some tourist's RV. She realized with regret that his dignified profile did not denote wisdom. And now, with his wings spread and the shiny metal cylinder clutched tightly in his talons, he's bringing the problem home. Her husband is not only a narcissist; he's a thief. She will ask for the aerie in the divorce.

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Linda Courtland is a freelance travel and entertainment writer living in Los Angeles and dreaming of Alaska. Her work has appeared on AOL's city guides, Luxury Link's travel website, The Huffington Post, and the "About Me" section of her latest online dating profile.