Hawking Loogies

by Shonali Bhowmik

As I was picnicking on a sunny afternoon under a sprawling oak tree with my friends, a cute little grey squirrel scurried past us. When I got up to throw away the trash, the squirrel stopped directly in front of me and stood up on his hind legs. He was wearing a look of disgust and as he propped his claws on his hips, he leaned back and hawked a loogie straight on to the middle of my forehead. I was in shock, laughing nervously, hoping to make it clear that he was not to do it again. The squirrel was clear that I would be his muse and at every step he hawked loogie after loogie, making them all bulls' eyes. When I awoke I was relieved but now I am stuck on that rascal and can't seem to figure out whether he was my friend or my enemy.


Shonali Bhowmik is the leader of the band Tigers and Monkeys and a member of the comedy group The Variety Shac. She pays her bills working as a temporary attorney.